Favourite Movie Quotes/Scenes

LOL.

I love Clerks 2.

"Lawzy, we got to have a doctor. I don't know nothin' 'bout birthin' babies" - Gone with the wind


hahaha sad... but halarious

Yes i am old skewl

Napoleon Dynamite: Stay home and eat all the freakin' chips, Kip.
Kip: Napoleon, don't be jealous that I've been chatting online with babes all day. Besides, we both know that I'm training to be a cage fighter.
Napoleon Dynamite: Since when, Kip? You have the worst reflexes of all time.
Kip: Try and hit me, Napoleon.
Napoleon Dynamite: What?
Kip: I said come down here and see what happens if you try and hit me.





BAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA

Bridget Jones' Diary;

Bridget: "Thank you, Daniel, that is very good to know. But if staying here means working within 10 yards of you, frankly, I'd rather have a job wiping Saddam Hussein's arse."

Bridget: "I choose Vodka. And Chaka Khan."

Bridget: "Resolution #1: UGH - Will obviously lose 20 pounds. #2: Always put last night's panties in the laundry basket. Equally important: will find nice sensible boyfriend and stop forming romantic attachments to any of the following: alcoholics, workoholics, sexaholics, commitment-phobics, peeping toms, megalomaniacs, emotional fuckwits, or perverts. Will especially stop fantasizing about a particular person who embodies all these things."

Mark Darcy: "Mother, I do not need a blind date. Particularly not with some verbally incontinent spinster who drinks like a fish, smokes like a chimney, and dresses like her mother."


Blues Brothers;

Elwood: "Illinois Nazis."
Jake: "I hate Illinois Nazis."


In the resturant where Jake is trying to freak out the Matire'd by scaring customers;
Jake:"I want to buy your women... the little girl... your daughters. Sell them to me. Sell me your children"


Elwood: "It's 106 miles to Chicago, we've got a full tank of gas, half a pack of cigarettes, it's dark and we're wearing sunglasses."



Girl Interrupted;

Lisa: "Razors pain you, Rivers are damp, Acid stains you, Drugs cause cramps. Guns aren't lawful, Nooses give, Gas smells awful, You might as well live"

In therapy -

Instructor: "Now what kind of a tree can you be, Janet, down there on the floor?"
Janet: "Im a fucking shrub alright!!?"

From 'Buying the Cow';

"There is no such thing as the one. It's more of a mind boggling whole hell of a lot of potential ones. That should be comforting, it's actually pretty terrifying. We would all like to kick back and wait for some magical force to show us who we should spend the rest of our lives with. But the truth is, there isn't a lightning bolt that slaps you on the ass and tells you to pick this person over all others. It's like the rain, rain falls all the time. Sometimes we are prepared for it, sometimes we're not. And depending where you are when it hits, you either get caught in it, or you don't. In fact, most of us try like hell to avoid it."

10 Things I Hate About You:

Kat crashes into Joeys car...
Walter Stratford: "Whoops???!! My insurance does not cover PMS!"

Michael: "The shit-ith, hath hit-ith, the fan.......ith"

(when trying to find a date for Kat, they interview a whimpy guy...)
Whimpy Guy: "Maybe if we were the last two people alive, and there were no sheep.... Are there sheep?"

Walter: "Alright, wait a minute. No drinking, no drugs, no kissing, no tattoos, no piercings, NO ritual animal slaughters of any kind. Oh, God, I'm giving them ideas."

if you haven't seen Chasing Amy, I HIGHLY recommend it. It's a fantatic relationship movie, and one of my personal top 5 fave movies.



I couldn't find the full clip of the below, but that scene is amazing in the movie...

the proper "Chasing Amy" speech.

The Original Ending of Clerks. Kevin Smith wasn't sure of how to end the movie, and the movie, with this ending, was shown at a film festival. The audience reportedly "hated it" (the ending).

For those who haven't seen Clerks, I also recommend it.

As much as I wish Clerks had of originally ended this way, it would have meant there would be no more View Askewiniverse movies which would have totally sucked.

I love this scene, it's so simple and ironic, and really quite beautiful. It would have reset the tone of the entire movie. It fits in perfectly with Dante's "I'm not even supposed to be here today!" remarks, and how Dante's favourtie movie is 'The Empire Strikes Back' simply because it ends on a down note.

Fave Quotes from Clerks;

Dante Hicks: You get me slapped with a fine, you argue with the customers and I have to patch everything up, you get us thrown out of a funeral by violating the corpse, and then to top it off, you ruin my relationship. I mean, what's your encore? Do you, like, anally rape my mother while pouring sugar in my gas tank?

Silent Bob: There's a million fine looking women in the world, dude. But, they don't all bring you lasagna at work. Most of 'em just cheat on you.

Randal Graves: Which did you like better? "Jedi" or "The Empire Strikes Back?"
Dante Hicks: "Empire."
Randal Graves: Blasphemy.
Dante Hicks: "Empire" had the better ending. Luke gets his hand cut off, finds out Vader is his father, uh, Han gets frozen, taken away by Boba Fett. It ends on such a down note. I mean, that's what life is, a series of down endings. All "Jedi" had was a bunch of Muppets.

Dante Hicks: I'm stuck in this pit, working for less than slave wages, working on my day off, the steel shutters are closed, I deal with every backward-assed fuck on the planet, I smell like shoe polish, my ex-girlfriend is catatonic after fucking a dead guy, and my present girlfriend has sucked thirty-six dicks.
Randal Graves: Thirty-seven.

Dante Hicks: Try not to suck any dick on your way to the parking lot!
[A man hears and heads after Veronica.]
Dante Hicks: Hey! Get back here!

Randal Graves: Hey, I'm a firm believer in the philosophy of a ruling class, especially since I rule.

Randal Graves: Hey, you know, you and I have something in common - we both eat Chinese.
Caitlin Bree: Dick.
Randal Graves: Exactly.

Mean Girls Quotes;

Gretchen:
I'm sorry that people are so jealous of me... but I can't help it that I'm so popular.


Regina:
I gave him everything... I was half a virgin when I met him!



Coach Carr:
Don't have sex, because you will get pregnant and die! Don't have sex
in the missionary position, don't have sex standing up, just don't do
it, OK, promise? OK, now everybody take some rubbers.


Gretchen:
What are you supposed to be?
*Points to her headband*
Karen:
I'm a MOUSE. DUH.


Jason:
Did you see nipple? It only counts if you saw a nipple!


Karen:
On Wednesdays we wear pink!


Karen:
You know who's looking fine tonight? Seth Mosakowski.
Gretchen:
Okay, you did not just say that.
Karen:
What? He's a good kisser.
Gretchen:
He's your cousin.
Karen:
Yeah, but he's my first cousin.
Gretchen:
Right.
Karen:
So, you have your cousins, and then you have your first cousins, and then you have your second cousins...
Gretchen:
No, honey, uh-uh.
Karen:
That's not right, is it?
Gretchen:
That is so not right.


Coach Carr:
At your age, you're going to have a lot of urges. You're going to want
to take off your clothes, and touch each other. But if you do touch
each other, you will get chlamydia... and die.


Gretchen: Why should Caesar get to stomp around like a giant, while the rest of
us try not to get smushed under his big feet? What's so great about
Caesar? Hm? Brutus is just as cute as Caesar. Brutus is just as smart
as Caesar. People totally like Brutus just as much as they like Caesar.
And when did it become okay for one person to be the boss of everybody,
huh? Because that's not what Rome is about. We should totally just STAB Caesar!


Bethany Byrd: Most people think I'm lying about being a virgin because I prefer jumbo
tampons, but I can't help it if I have a heavy flow and a wide-set
vagina!


Lolololololol.
I love Mean Girls.

Man i love Clerks
(in response to Sarahs Clerks quote)

Stand By Me:

Teddy Duchamp: While you guys are dragging your candy-asses halfway across the state and back, I'll be waiting for you on the other side, relaxing with my thoughts.
Gordie Lachance: You use your left hand or your right hand for that?

Gordie Lachance: Mickey's a mouse, Donald's a duck, Pluto's a dog. What's Goofy?
Teddy Duchamp: Goofy's a dog. He's definitely a dog.
Chris Chambers: He can't be a dog. He wears a hat and drives a car.
Vern Tessio: God, that's weird. What the Hell is Goofy?

Gordie Lachance: Suck my fat one, you cheap dime-store hood.

Chris Chambers: Teddy, act your age.
Teddy Duchamp: This is my age. I'm in the prime of my youth and I'll only be young once.
Chris Chambers: Yeah, but you're going to be stupid for the rest of your life.

Chris Chambers: You ready for school?
Gordie Lachance: Yeah.
Chris Chambers: Junior High. You know what that means. By next June we'll all be split up.
Gordie Lachance: What're you talking about, why would that happen?
Chris Chambers: It's not gonna be like grammar-school, that's why. You're taking your college courses and me Teddy and Vern will all be in the shop courses with all the rest of the retards making ashtrays and birdhouses. You gonna meet a lot of new guys. Smart guys.
Gordie Lachance: Meet a lot of pussies is what you mean.
Chris Chambers: No man. Don't say that, don't even think that.
Gordie Lachance: Not going to meet a lot of pussies, forget it!
Chris Chambers: Well then you're an asshole!
Gordie Lachance: What's asshole about wanting to be with your friends?
Chris Chambers: It's asshole if your friends drag you down! You hang with us, you'll be just another wise guys with shit for brains.

ya'll should know I watch WAY too many movies.

Dogma.
I just watched this, and I have a lot of favourite quotes from it, so bear with me...

Liz: He said that faith is like a glass of water. When you're young, the glass is small, and it's easy to fill up. But the older you get, the bigger the glass gets, and the same amount of liquid doesn't fill it anymore. Periodically, the glass has to be refilled.
Bethany: You're suggesting I need to get filled?
Liz: In more ways than one. You need to get laid, Bethany Sloane. You need a man, if only for ten minutes.
Bethany: It's been my experience that the average male is never a man. Not even for ten minutes in his entire lifespan.
Liz: That'a a bit militant. You thinking of joining the other side?
Bethany: Couldn't do it. Women are insane.
Liz: Then YOU need to go back to church and ask God for a third option.
Bethany: I think that God is dead.
Liz: The sign of a true Catholic.

Jay: Guys like us just don't fall out of the fucking sky, you know.
[Rufus falls out of the sky]
Jay: Beautiful, naked, big-titted women just don't fall out of the sky, you know.

[after Rufus has fallen from the sky]
Bethany: Speaking of which, you're awfully nude. Rufus, is it?
Rufus: Yes, Rufus it is. It's usually 'Long Rufus' but it's a little cold out here, ya know?

[Rufus starts walking]
Bethany: Wait a second! Between guys with wings, guys falling out of the sky, and guys trying like hell to fuck me, I think I've been pretty patient so far, and I'm not taking another step until you tell me where the hell you came from!
Rufus: Me? I came from heaven.
[starts walking again]

Jay: Yo man, tell me something about me.
Rufus: You masturbate more than anyone on the planet.
Jay: Aw fuck, everyone knows that. Tell me something nobody knows.
Rufus: When you do it, you're thinking about guys.
[a shocked Silent Bob stares at Jay]
Jay: Dude, not all the time.

Rufus: [Talking about Jesus] He still digs humanity, but it bothers Him to see the shit that gets carried out in His name - wars, bigotry, televangelism. But especially the factioning of all the religions. He said humanity took a good idea and, like always, built a belief structure on it.
Bethany: Having beliefs isn't good?
Rufus: I think it's better to have ideas. You can change an idea. Changing a belief is trickier. Life should malleable and progressive; working from idea to idea permits that. Beliefs anchor you to certain points and limit growth; new ideas can't generate. Life becomes stagnant.

Jay: No wonder he saw Jesus. Homey's rockin' the ganj.

Rufus: Jesus wasn't white, Jesus was black.
Bethany: Well then why did he get written about and you didn't?
Rufus: Well, he IS the son of God. Kinda hard to have a New Testament without him. So you fudge a few facts, put a spin on his ethnicity. Leavin' me out's okay because you still got twelve white boys to choose from.
Jay: Are you buying any of this shit?

Rufus: White folks only want to hear the good shit: life eternal, a place in God's Heaven. But as soon as they hear they're getting this good shit from a black Jesus, they freak. And that, my friends, is called hypocrisy. A black man can steal your stereo, but he can't be your Savior.

Nun: You don't believe in God because of Alice in Wonderland?
Loki: No, "Through the Looking Glass". That poem, "The Walrus and the Carpenter" that's an indictment of organized religion. The walrus, with his girth and his good nature, he obviously represents either Buddha, or... or with his tusk, the Hindu elephant god, Lord Ganesha. That takes care of your Eastern religions. Now the carpenter, which is an obvious reference to Jesus Christ, who was raised a carpenter's son, he represents the Western religions. Now in the poem, what do they do... what do they do? They... They dupe all these oysters into following them and then proceed to shuck and devour the helpless creatures en masse. I don't know what that says to you, but to me it says that following these faiths based on mythological figures ensure the destruction of one's inner-being. Organized religion destroys who we are by inhibiting our actions... by inhibiting our decisions, out of... out of fear of some... some intangible parent figure who... who shakes a finger at us from thousands of years ago and says... and says, "Do it - Do it and I'll fuckin' spank you. "

Jay: Get offa me. I wanna see what's up. What the fuck is this shit? Who the fuck are you, lady? Why the fuck did you hug my head?
Metatron: Quite a little mouth on him, isn't there?
Jay: What the fuck is this, The Piano? Why ain't this broad talking?
Metatron: I believe the answers that you seek lie within my companion's eyes.
Jay: What the fuck does that mean? Has everyone gone fuckin' nuts? What the fuck happened to that guy's head? I want some...
[God kisses him on the cheek. Jay faints]

Bethany: What's he like?
Metatron: God? Lonely. But funny. He's got a great sense of humor. Take sex for example. There's nothing funnier than the ridiculous faces you people make mid-coitus.
Bethany: Sex is a joke in heaven?
Metatron: The way I understand it, it's mostly a joke down here, too.

Bethany: Then - I don't mean to sound ungrateful - but what are you doing hanging around?
Jay: We're here to pick up chicks.
Bethany: Excuse me?
Jay: We figure an abortion clinic is a good place to meet loose women. Why else would they be there unless they like to fuck?

Serendipity: [On Catholicism] I have issues with anyone who treats faith as a burden instead of a blessing. You people don't celebrate your faith; you mourn it.

Serendipity: Leave it to the Catholics to destroy existence.

Bethany: Wait a minute. Christ. You know Christ?
Rufus: Knew him? Shit, nigga owes me 12 bucks!

Bethany: You were martyred?
Rufus: That's one way of putting it. Another way of putting it would be to say that I was bludgeoned to death by huge fucking rocks.

Rufus: You are the great great great GREAT great grand-niece of Jesus Christ.
Jay: So that would make Bethany... part black?

Bartleby: The humans have besmirched everything bestowed on them. They were given Paradise, they threw it away. They were given this planet, they destroyed it. They were favored best among all His endeavors, and some of them don't even believe He exists. And in spite of it all, He's shown them infinite fucking patience at every turn. What about us? I asked you... once to lay down the sword because I felt sorry for them. What was the result? Our expulsion from Paradise. WHERE WAS HIS INFINITE FUCKING PATIENCE THEN? IT'S NOT RIGHT, IT'S NOT FAIR. We've paid our debt. Don't you think it's time? Don't you think its time we went home? and to do that, I think we have to dispatch of our would-be dispatchers.

Rufus: I'm telling you, man, this ceremony is a big mistake.
Cardinal Glick: The Catholic Church does not make mistakes.
Rufus: Please. What about the Church's silent consent to the slave trade?
Bethany: And its platform of non involvement during the Holocaust?
Cardinal Glick: All right, mistakes were made.

And for your viewing pleasure, two awesome scenes from Kevin Smith's "Dogma"...

My most favourite teen movie scene ever, it nearly makes me cry watching this now. Heath's voice was amazing... I remember reading that they told him to tone down his voice as they thought it was too good for a "teenage" boy to have.

Enjoy...

Sarah wrote:

My most favourite teen movie scene ever, it nearly makes me cry watching this now. Heath's voice was amazing... I remember reading that they told him to tone down his voice as they thought it was too good for a "teenage" boy to have.

Enjoy...

janie's got a gunnn....janie briggs got a gun....
SHES GOT A GUN! *Everybody pisses off running*

*TASER* "just give us the gun janie."

The Notebook, since I'm such a sucka for romance.

Noah; If your a bird, I'm a bird.

__________


Noah; My Dearest Allie. I couldn't sleep last night because I know that it's over between us. I'm not bitter anymore, because I know that what we had was real. And if in some distant place in the future we see each other in our new lives, I'll smile at you with joy and remember how we spent the summer beneath the trees, learning from each other and growing in love. The best love is the kind that awakens the soul and makes us reach for more, that plants a fire in our hearts and brings peace to our minds, and that's what you've given me. That's what I hope to give to you forever. I love you. I'll be seeing you. Noah.

__________

Allie; [After sex] You gotta be kiddin me. All this time, that's what I've been missin'? Let's do it again.

__________

Noah; I am nothing special; just a common man with common thoughts, and I've led a common life. There are no monuments dedicated to me and my name will soon be forgotten. But in one respect I have succeeded as gloriously as anyone who's ever lived: I've loved another with all my heart and soul; and to me, this has always been enough.
__________

Ohhhhh, & this scene never fails to make me cry!

Allie; Do you think our love, can take us away together?
Duke; I think our love can do anything we want it to.
Allie; I love you.
Duke: I love you, Allie.
Allie; Good night.
Duke; Good night. I'll be seeing you.

_________


Ohhhh, how I love 'The Notebook'.
When Adam & I broke up I was way to hating on love to watch it.
But now I've fallen in love with it all over again

i will NEVER EVER watch the notebook.. ever

hey_its_that_bar_guy wrote:i will NEVER EVER watch the notebook.. ever

yeah i've never seen it... i'm not too big on romantic movies, although i do love romeo + juliet... only cause i'm a sucker for shakespeare

hey andy wanna watch the notebook on our movie night? lmao.

hahahah maybe.. hahaha






oh yeah btw.. no. haha

i was hoping you'd say that lol

if i wanted to watch it, i'd have seen it by now.

good hahaha.. cause ive decided .. a mission in life is to NEVER watch it hahaha.

Well my mission in life is to replace all of both Sarah & Andrews dvds with copies of the notebook so you have no choice but to watch it on your movie night! Lol.

worst idea ever

movie night is totally not happening if that plan of yours goes ahead samantha

i no we'll get two copies of the dark night .. and then hide them
and id rather watch sarah torture you for her movies back hahaha.